(theme song plays)
CHORUS: ♪ Kiff! Kiff! Kiff! ♪
♪ Kiff-Kiff-Kiff! ♪
♪ Kiff-Kiff-Kiff-Kiff! ♪
♪ Kiff! Kiff! Kiff! Kiff! Kiff! Kiff! ♪
♪ Kiff! Kiff! Kiff! ♪
♪ Kiff! ♪
(giggle)
DILTON WIBBON: Brought to you by Wibbon's Ribbons.
Looking for ribbons? Think Wibbon's!
First person to climb Mount Table?
Lady Jane Harness!
First person to fly planes at Bench Beach?
The Left Brothers!
First to swim the Agyeman Channel?
Erica Von Ant!
(chuckles) That's right, Kiff.
- (bell rings) - How d'you remember the names
of all those people who did all those first things?
Sweet, beautiful Barry,
those "people" are my future peers.
I'll be joining them soon, 'cause...
(grunts)
♪ I got a thirst to be the first ♪
♪ To be the first is not the worst ♪
♪ It's the best! ♪
♪ No one remembers The second person to climb ♪
♪ The highest peak, no ♪
♪ I got a thirst to be the first ♪
♪ You're not forgotten When you're the first ♪
♪ Oh, that's right I just rhymed first with first ♪
♪ I'm the first to do that! ♪
♪ I'm gonna be the first ♪
♪ To keep my eyes open when I... ♪
- Ah... choo! - ♪ Open when I sneeze ♪
♪ I'm gonna be the first to do that ♪
♪ Simultaneously while I am The first to cure disease! ♪
♪ You're gonna see! ♪
♪ Big stuff is meant ♪
♪ Big stuff is meant for me! ♪
♪ I got big things! Big is my destiny ♪
♪ I got a thirst! ♪
♪ I got a thirst to be the first... ♪
...person to drink from the brand new water fountain
that's being installed.
(sad music playing)
We're gonna miss ya, Drippy.
Yep, there's nothing more important than having your name
in the annals of Table Town history one day.
And by "one day," I mean "tomorrow".
Principal Secretary!
Ready for the rehearsal? Ready, ready, ready?
Oh, uh, hi Kiff, yes, um, listen.
Is this all really necessary?
You're just cutting a ribbon and taking a sip.
Do we need a rehearsal?
(laughs) You crack me up, PS.
Obviously we're gonna need to rehearse.
I think we can all agree that this is a huge deal.
(slurps)
(Kiff) Ahh!
Wow. Riveting stuff.
I'll see you tomorrow for the real thing, Kiff.
Wanna take one last sip? For old time's sake?
You go ahead. I'm savin' my sip for tomorrow.
- (alarm rings) - (sighs)
Today's the day. Let's do this.
Huh, that's weird.
Come on, Taily, quit slacking!
We're awake now!
Ah, well, uh, let's go make history!
(strains)
(grunts) Come on!
Glass of OJ, Kiffster?
No juice today, Dad!
I'm saving myself for a special sip. (chuckles)
(loud thud)
Kiff, are you feeling all right?
Your tail's not looking so good.
Droop Tail is no joke!
I think you'd better stay home from school today.
(dramatic music playing)
Mom, be reasonable!
Taily and I never felt better, right, Taily?
Ah, yeah, Don't do this, Beryl!
Not today! (sobs)
Oh, I will do this today, Taily!
- (thud) - I gotta get to work.
Martin, babe, make sure Kiff gets plenty of rest
and stays home.
There. Now, if she tries to leave, remember;
"Kiff is tricking you."
You got it, hun.
Cheer up, Kiff! You get the day off!
(whimsical music playing)
There is no way I'm missing the first sip.
The key to looking healthy enough to go to school?
Rosy cheeks.
(grunts)
And... lively fur.
(hairdryer continues in distance)
"Acorn Coma"? Holy cow...
Buckets of Popcorn? Holy cow!
(yawns) Hoo boy, when you're right, you're right.
That little bit o' rest cured me right up!
Kiffy, I'm so relieved to hear you say that!
Uh-- You look, um...
Healthy.
A little too healthy...
Which is great!
Nice try, buddy. Back to bed!
(line ringing)
(phone rings)
Where are you? I'm freaking out!
Barry! Listen to me.
I am a prisoner of some new-age parenting fad
called "staying home from school and resting
when you don't feel well."
You gotta help me sneak past my dad!
- Okay, okay, uh... - (Miss Deer Teacher) Buns?
Yes, um, present!
Chatterley?
Chatterley...?
(Kiff) Quick, put me on speaker!
Present!
- Fox? - (Candle Fox) Here.
(whispering) It worked!
That bought us some time.
Now listen carefully...
- (phone rings) - Y'ello?
(Barry) Hello. I'm, um, Kiff's regular doctor.
Dr. Lyon, my mane man!
It's my medical opinion that Kiff Chatterley
is in perfect health and should be rushed to school post-haste.
Oh, my! Sure! (chuckles) What a relief.
Things are probably crazy over there at the hospital, huh?
"Hospital"? I'm not at the hospital.
Oh, of course, you obviously have a private practice.
A what? What are you implying?
(chuckles) Look at me, talking the ear off
of an honest, professional adult doctor.
Ah, I can't take it, you're cracking me like an egg!
I'm not a doctor, I'm just a Barry.
I didn't mean to trick you, Mr. Martin.
Trick me?
Ah, nuts!
(Barry) I'm sorry, Kiff!
Bed!
(twittering)
(laughing)
(lips smacking) Sure could use that first sip right now.
It's almost time!
(all) The first sip!
(tense music playing)
(music continues to play)
Well, that's it. History will forget all about me,
so long as that fridge keeps tattling and ruining
my brilliant schemes.
(gasps) Wait.
That's it! I don't need to outsmart Dad,
I need to outsmart the fridge!
If it isn't the Kiffster!
Up to another trick, no doubt.
Come on, let's hear it!
Dad! I really got ya! (laughs)
This whole time I never even had Droop Tail!
(laughs) I've just been cast in a play...
about a character with Droop Tail. (laughs)
I'm a method actor.
Can I... see some?
Why, Father?
Why didn't you want me climb Mount Table that day?
You would crush my ambition simply because I had a little
Droop Tail due to the altitude?
Don't do it, character's Father.
A cruel gust of wind bloweth!
(gasps)
(dramatic groan)
And... scene.
That was amazing! Couple notes--
Whoa, look at the time! This has been so helpful
but I really oughta get to school now.
Hold it right there.
You know I gotta run this past the fridge.
Okay, let's see...
"Kiff is King Yo".
(laughs) You're my little king.
And I love "yo."
I love yo too, Dad!
Gotta dash!
(grunts)
(pants) He bought it.
And now to race to school to make it just in time!
(cheering)
(chanting) First sip. First sip!
Master of ceremonies, reporting for duty!
(triumphant music playing)
(sighs) Let's make some history.
(dreamy music playing)
(music continue to play)
(music ends abruptly)
Kiff?
...Fountain?
Okay. Maybe I'm not entirely up to going to school today.
Hang on...
♪ I got a thirst to be the first ♪
I'm savin' my sip for tomorrow! No juice today, Dad!
Sure could use that first sip right now...
Thirst... thirst... Thirst!
What are you realizing down there, Kiff?
I don't have Droop Tail! I'm just thirsty!
(sighs)
Can't argue with Taily.
All right, kiddo, get to school!
Good luck on that play!
Ah, I missed it.
(Barry) Or did you?
What? Whoa!
Barry! What?
Oh, well...
This is the first time this has ever happened.
You're the best.
(chuckles)
Thanks, Bar! I know how hard it must have been for you
to not finish that sandwich.
(Barry, mouth full) It was!